Telephone

The telephone is the greatest nuisance among conveniences and the greatest convenience among nuisances.

When I was a kid, the telephone stayed in one place; it did not follow you around the house. I want to know where my appliances are at all times, thank you. I am not ready for that Trilogy of Terror moment.

How can you detest Graham Bell for creating telemarketing by indirectly creating the telephone? The telephone is not a crapulent invention, instead, it is perhaps the most influential invention in human history. Think of how, despite appearing insignificant and commonplace, a telephone is important in your everyday communication. Better to have your dinner interupted than to hear too late of some interesting example I am too lazy to contrive. Think people! Think! Argh.

Mr Graham Bell can be loved or detested. Depends on whether the telephone brings you calls from people who love you or from the telephone company telling you your bill is unpaid and they are about to cut you off.

Hearing some voices on the phone can cause ineffable happiness and excitement. Only the conversation afterwards often fails to live up to the opening moments of ecstasy. Could we invent a machine that, when necessary, transmits significant silence?

the last of the beer drained
the end of countless cigarettes
credit cards tapped out
empty baggies of yesterdays lunch
the sigh of a world condemed to be inhabited by humans,
a cellphone rings in the distance

Lots of things have opposites. I don't think »Telephone« is one of them.

Eno H. Pelet